DH and I have lost 12 pregnancies, and also had a failed adoption when we brought a newborn home and 16 days later had to give her back, as the birth mother changed her mind. Both sides of our family virtually have ignored everything.
The first few miscarriages, we had a few "sorry"'s, then later ones weren't commented on at all. Our failed adoption was never mentioned by any of them, as though she never happened to us, as though she wasn't a loss for us.
FF to now, I'm 21 weeks pregnant at 40 yrs old after 10 years of heartbreaks. I'm not out of the woods yet, as there have been some tests which have revealed potential problems.
We have not yet told any family I'm pregnant yet (we don't see/live near any family.) DH wants to tell them soon, "for support" and "they'll be happy for us." I couldn't care less about what they think. I'm leaning toward a few phone calls once we bring baby home from the hospital, informing them we've had a baby. DH is very much against this.
What do you all think?
The first few miscarriages, we had a few "sorry"'s, then later ones weren't commented on at all. Our failed adoption was never mentioned by any of them, as though she never happened to us, as though she wasn't a loss for us.
FF to now, I'm 21 weeks pregnant at 40 yrs old after 10 years of heartbreaks. I'm not out of the woods yet, as there have been some tests which have revealed potential problems.
We have not yet told any family I'm pregnant yet (we don't see/live near any family.) DH wants to tell them soon, "for support" and "they'll be happy for us." I couldn't care less about what they think. I'm leaning toward a few phone calls once we bring baby home from the hospital, informing them we've had a baby. DH is very much against this.
What do you all think?