Ok, BG is around somewhere, but quick BG is that DH was molested by his brother. BIL and his wife (OSIL) are BSC. DH's sister is very close with BIL and OSIL. DH told MIL and FIL about the abuse Dec of 2012. We have been very distant, but they have been understanding regarding us not being around BIL and OSIL. YSIL is collateral damage. IL's still spend time with BIL, OSIL and YSIL lives with IL's.
On to problem....we moved across country in Jan. (YAY) It's been amazing. DH's extended family lives here and we've had a great time with aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. None of them know about the abuse (that we know of). This week, there are 2 bridal showers, a graduation party and a high school graduation we are planning to attend. We've known IL's are flying in Tuesday and will be here until the 8th, and we would see them at these functions. We haven't seen them since December since they live where we used to. We found out today from DH's aunt that BIL, OSIL and SIL are coming in town for the functions. IL's never told us!!! We have RSVP'd to everything and now they will be there. I am livid.
Do we go and ignore them? Do we call, decline and tell them why? I am so sick of not going and doing things we want to because those fuckers will be there. I refuse to take my kids if they will be there. We haven't seen them in almost 3 years. If their kids are there do I ignore them too? I AM SO FUCKING PISSED OFF. Please excuse the language, but I am anxious as hell, nervous, angry, sad, frustrated, etc. Part of me is mad at DH too for not telling the extended family about the abuse and stopping the "good guy" persona everyone is fooled by from his piece of shit brother. Any advcse would be appreciated. Thank you.
↧
Family functions and IL's. Poss trigger, X posted UD pg.7, Epic UD pg. 8, ?pg 15, ud 19,21
↧