Ive been thinking of posting for a while now but just needed to muster up the courage.
ive been in therapy for FOO issues and realized how they invalidated me and how I basically have had to re-learn regular behaviors since this has come to light.
Theyve ramped up the insanity since we didnt want them to see us or the kids 1x a week like they used to get(yes enmeshed I know). I had been doing good, being able to deal with things directly, see things for what they are. Maybe 1x a month if they were following boundaries. But... they got greedy and are more entranced with my kids then trying to have any kind of health relationship with me. No overnights for the kids because the therapist thought some of their behaviors they may not realize they do but even so its not good but cant be confronted because its subconcious I guess.
This all led to a full on CO recently. MOO lost her shit. Showed up at a public event for DD totally uninvited and it freaked me the fuck out. CO ensued through FOO by therapists suggestion, because FOO is more calm than MOO thought we would get out full CO speech(dont contact us we'll contact you, etc etc) but it didnt go well. I found out that FOO has never really cared all that much about me or my kids it just shuts dear old MOO up so he guilt tripped and told me how I have much more issues than THEY realized.
It was so clear that it needed to happen. I dont want this for my kids. DHs family we dont see since they are toxic as fuck. Now mine is all gone, literally maybe 1-2 people that are ok to be around that arent FMs. I have DH and the kids so why do I feel like this? Is there some advice you ladies can give for a person new to CO FOO?