Sorry this may be long - I'll try and shorten where I can. I posted a few weeks ago letting you all know we finally put my DH's parents on a TO about 3 weeks ago - quick BG
I'm 19 weeks pregnant now. Some really quick summary of BG She did this when I was pregnant with my girls - she said that I would need to stand upside down on my head because the cord might come out. (Also tried to take opportunity from me to touch my DD for first time and do her cares.) So with this pregnancy I told my DH I was done with her craziness and if she did anything crazy at all that I would need to take a break. She started telling me that if I VBAC'd I'd probably die or kill the baby as well as saying that I would most likely miscarry since I had a little bleeding though the doctor said everything looked fine.
So here is my problem. We are finding out if we are having a boy or a girl in a week and we were going to invite family and close friends to tell everyone. We're planning on not inviting PIL at all. We are concerned that ILs will find out about the party from other family and have a major tantrum. Do we just not care and keep the TO going? Tell them through a letter what we are having? I want to keep the spine I've developed through your help but need some guidance. My DH has been great through all this we just aren't sure how to proceed.
Here are some recent Lama Noms - my FIL has been sending my DH text messages -which DH keeps BHing except one I'll post in a bit... (Just so you know some of this is confusing, he states later what he was meaning by it...)
"My father had to have heart surgery to save his life. At that time they put in a metal valve because he relied on his doctor and medicine. He wasn't supposed to live for more than a year and when he went in for another surgery to stop the clinking in his ears, it bought him even more time. He lived another 10 years, which was a blessing because he relied on medical advice from his doctors. Don't be upset regarding following sound counsel. Honor your parents as well as your Heavenly Father and that will be a blessing to you and your family. Do all you can to help Ames get through her pregnancy well. My father wouldn't have been blessed with a longer life without listening to his doctors."
He is talking about his dad (my DH's grandfather) because he is saying that if he hadn't have listened to his doctor's medical advice then he would have died. He said that because they strongly believe that if I don't listen to my MIL's medical advice that I will die and my baby will as well if I don't listen to her and have another c-section. Would you keep the TO going until baby is here? Past that...and when we decide TO is over what should we tell them? (Do we state boundaries and consequences if they aren't followed?) I'll post other texts in a few minutes...