My mom is a manipulative, mentally abusive, self entitled, self centered twat who didn't even care I was pregnant until I delivered then suddenly is all over me and up my ass. That's really all there is to it. So there's your background.
She wants to visit me and my lo whenever the mood strikes her and I shut her down. I told her she needs to schedule a time at the very least a day or 2 in advance to see us that doesn't inconvenience me, or my husband just like everyone else. Well that ended in a fight because she feels she should be able to see me whenever she wants. We didn't talk for a few weeks then she wants me to come visit for the weekend. We only have one car and dh works nights 20min away. I told her no I can't dh needs the car. That ended in a fight because she thinks now dh is stopping me from seeing family(specifically her). Well my step father's grandmother passed away last week and I spent the weekend with them (they came and got me and lo)2 nights and 3 days, and my mom threw a fit when I told her I needed to get back home by a certain time because dh and I needed to run and do bills because some are only in my name from before marriage. Again she thinks dh is stopping me from spending time with family and controlling my every move. Yes we have a D/s type dynamic but he'd never actually stop me from seeing family. We have told her on several occasions that dh goes to bed at 2 and if you want to see us 1)let us know a few days in advance so we can clear our schedule and 2)you need to leave by 2 so dh can sleep for work; It's up to you when you show up but be gone by 2. I don't think it's unreasonable for us to agree on a date and time ahead of time. Dh and I are adults with our own lives and things to do and can't just drop everything because you feel entitled to see us. Idk what else to say to her. After the fight when we left she sent me an email that essentially said if you want to see me or talk to me you make the effort since your asshole of a husband won't allow us to visit. Which from what was said above obviously isn't the case at all. She even removed me from Facebook and took down all pictures she had of me and lo.
I just don't know what to say to her anymore how do I make her understand that she doesn't get whatever she wants and it's not just her who has to schedule a time to see me and lo? I'm at the end of my rope with her.
She wants to visit me and my lo whenever the mood strikes her and I shut her down. I told her she needs to schedule a time at the very least a day or 2 in advance to see us that doesn't inconvenience me, or my husband just like everyone else. Well that ended in a fight because she feels she should be able to see me whenever she wants. We didn't talk for a few weeks then she wants me to come visit for the weekend. We only have one car and dh works nights 20min away. I told her no I can't dh needs the car. That ended in a fight because she thinks now dh is stopping me from seeing family(specifically her). Well my step father's grandmother passed away last week and I spent the weekend with them (they came and got me and lo)2 nights and 3 days, and my mom threw a fit when I told her I needed to get back home by a certain time because dh and I needed to run and do bills because some are only in my name from before marriage. Again she thinks dh is stopping me from spending time with family and controlling my every move. Yes we have a D/s type dynamic but he'd never actually stop me from seeing family. We have told her on several occasions that dh goes to bed at 2 and if you want to see us 1)let us know a few days in advance so we can clear our schedule and 2)you need to leave by 2 so dh can sleep for work; It's up to you when you show up but be gone by 2. I don't think it's unreasonable for us to agree on a date and time ahead of time. Dh and I are adults with our own lives and things to do and can't just drop everything because you feel entitled to see us. Idk what else to say to her. After the fight when we left she sent me an email that essentially said if you want to see me or talk to me you make the effort since your asshole of a husband won't allow us to visit. Which from what was said above obviously isn't the case at all. She even removed me from Facebook and took down all pictures she had of me and lo.
I just don't know what to say to her anymore how do I make her understand that she doesn't get whatever she wants and it's not just her who has to schedule a time to see me and lo? I'm at the end of my rope with her.