My mother has no filter on her mouth and couldn't care less about how other people feel about the shit she spews. Ever since my BF and I got together about two years ago, she has made snide, snotty remarks about him and while she's never said anything strait up RUDE to him, she makes what I call her "faces" that speak for themselves. She will also say hirtful things to me about him and I find myself defending him a lot. She's the kind of person I have to be careful with when venting to because she will use it against me later. For example, "I'm angry because J was home all day and didnt do dishes." = "J is a horrid slob who sits on his ass and never does anything to help out. I'm basically a slave in my own home." We are expecting our first child together, a baby girl due in just three weeks. She has made comments before about how she wishes her daughters (my sister and I) and our daughters (her grandchildren) would just "come home an stay with her forever." Gag. She never mentions spending time with the fathers of our babies and would probably love it if they dropped off the face of the earth.
Her latest stint was about an hour ago. My sister is in the military and has a ten month old DD. she recently married a very nice guy who is also in the military and is the only father her DD knows. My mom didnt really approve of her getting married (shocker) but she has made her peace with it. My sister posted a picture of her DD on the debil and after a couple of comments, my mom started up this combo with my sisters DH:
Mom: you're my favorite son in law. I love you the most too.
SistersDH: lol how many son in laws do you have?
Mom: I only have one worth having. The other one don't count.
Sis: (to her DH) you're the first! (Meaning first Son in law)
Mom: He's my first and ONLY
Sis: lol J won't count?
Me: wow mom thanks.
Basically that was her being her usual passive aggressive self. Note she never actually says anything about J specifically but it's obvious she's being a massive ass. I feel like calling her out, but I don't know which method to use or what to say. J has been nothing but supportive and loving to me and has helped my mom move into the new house and we've babysat my 12 year old brother several times. I don't know why she treats J as if he's sub par. I know she looks favorably at anyone in the military so she probably thinks he's not good enough because he isn't in the service or makes millions. Help?
Her latest stint was about an hour ago. My sister is in the military and has a ten month old DD. she recently married a very nice guy who is also in the military and is the only father her DD knows. My mom didnt really approve of her getting married (shocker) but she has made her peace with it. My sister posted a picture of her DD on the debil and after a couple of comments, my mom started up this combo with my sisters DH:
Mom: you're my favorite son in law. I love you the most too.
SistersDH: lol how many son in laws do you have?
Mom: I only have one worth having. The other one don't count.
Sis: (to her DH) you're the first! (Meaning first Son in law)
Mom: He's my first and ONLY
Sis: lol J won't count?
Me: wow mom thanks.
Basically that was her being her usual passive aggressive self. Note she never actually says anything about J specifically but it's obvious she's being a massive ass. I feel like calling her out, but I don't know which method to use or what to say. J has been nothing but supportive and loving to me and has helped my mom move into the new house and we've babysat my 12 year old brother several times. I don't know why she treats J as if he's sub par. I know she looks favorably at anyone in the military so she probably thinks he's not good enough because he isn't in the service or makes millions. Help?