I met my husband overseas. We fell in love pretty quickly and I feel he is my soul mate. He's my best friend. Because we live and work overseas, we would travel back to his country or mine for vacations, staying with either of our parents. More often his parents because his country is closer, or so I thought. After a while I didn't like staying there because his mother was so suffocating. I mean, seriously, she treated me like I was a child who couldn't do anything for myself. I'm very independent - I was raised that way. So it was a bit of a nightmare. I was therefore keen to get our own place. While we were engaged, DH waa speaking with his parents about a house that had come up for sale. Completely renovated and going for a great price for a quick sale. Just one catch - it was right next door to his parents. DH said it would just be an investment property. Somewhere for us to stay during vacations. It made sense to me so I agreed. Boy, do I wish I didn't. After we moved in his parents were insufferable. MIL coming over all of the time. FIL telling us what to do with improvements to the property. MIL calling incessantly, insisting we eat at their house. She even came inside and shouted up the stairs to me while I was on the toilet!! Here's the worst part - DH is over at their house every day. He's treating our house as an extension of theirs. I had no idea he was so enmeshed. It got too much for me in the end so after we married - what a nightmare that was - I had a word with them both and put some boundaries in place. I was very gentle about it and made it more about me liking my space. Unfortunately DH found out and was very angry with me. I now know he is incredibly protective of his parents, MIL especially, and will defend them fiercely. I can't talk to him about it. We're planning on having a child but I'm really worried about my ILs and their meddling. We've just spent the holiday apart because I went home to see my family but he wanted to see his. While he's been there he's had all of his meals with them and she calls him every day. Yet when I'm there she backs off. He's making me look like a wicked witch! I had to tell her straight that she wasn't to clean our house, do our laundry or expect us to eat with them frequently - when I spoke with him today he was over at their house doing his laundry which means she was doing his laundry! I want to kill him. When I spoke with MIL she said family shouldn't have conditions and that she'd been very good to me. She also told my SisterIL that she couldn't have any grandchildren of hers living on the other side of the world. So now I understand the push for us to live next door.
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