My husband and I have made the choice to cut off 90% of our contact with my family. No phone calls, no visits, the only contact they get is the few pictures and post we make on FB. We also have limited contact with his mom as well.
It sucks however we had to make the choice because continuing a relationship with my parents was turning toxic.
Ever since I have had my girls, my parents have refused to listen to us about our girls. They treated us like were were stupid.My parents treated us like children and said "They know more because they have been there done that"
First it was small things like giving them candy..I instrusted them to give the girls NO candy but they did anyways. I got upset but they said I was overacting and that it's what granparents do. I instrusted my parents that in our house we do not hit or spank. If the children get out of control call us and we will come pick them up however my oldest daughter told me "Nona and Papa hit her". According to them "It was a small tap" Then the last straw was when they refused to listen to me about their food allergies.
My DH and I were tired of my parents attitude, we were tired of them bullying us and making us feel like crap. We were tired of them thinking they knew it all and we were tired of them not listening to us as parents. That was it, we cut off all contact.
However I feel like total shit. Honestly life has been SOO much better without them hovering over us or judging us for every choice we made. I feel like Shit because we won't be able to have those Christmas celebrations like we had in the past, I feel like shit because my children won't get to grow up with with their Uncles and future cousins. My husbands and only child and his mom is involved, but his mom is too clingy so we had to distance ourselves as well. No to mention after cutting contact off with my parents, my family started spreading horrible rumors to the rest of our family, my siblings, cousins etc.etc.etc. I have no idea what they said but based on what is said, no one will talk to us. Whatever their loss.
It just sucks! My daughters birthday is next week and we have nothing planned as we don't have anyone to celebrate with. We just move to a new city, don't really know anyone right now.
The part that pissed me off is my parents REFUSE to take responsibility for anything, they refuse to say they were wrong in their actions and think they did nothing wrong and I am "blowing everything out of proportion, that I am a drama queen etc etc"
I simply had ONE request from my parents. My only request was "Listen to our directions as parents. If we say don't spank our kids, do not spank our kids, if we say NO candy, it's no candy and DO not try to test your own theory when I tell you that kids have food allergies"...However they thought they knew more then us and refused to listen to us.
Im am so grieved it came to this point. I hope they will change and see how awful their actions were but they are in the their mid 60s and I doubt they will change, heck I doubt they will ever admit they did anything wrong..
I am wondering, has anyones family ever changed? or should I just accept it and move on..