So a bit of background... my husband and I found out we were expecting our first baby when I was 4 weeks along. We kept the info to ourselves and decided once we had our first appointment and heard the heartbeat we would share the information with our immediate family (parents and siblings). We had our appointment at 8.5 weeks and were told everything looked great so the following weekend we got together with our families and shared the news. With the news came strick instructions to keep it a secret as we wanted to tell our close friends in person (in our own time) and we didn't want anything on facebook due to co-workers being on facebook and not being ready to tell the whole world. Immediately after we told my ILs my MIL starts asking "well when can I share the news" to which we responded "once we've put in on facebook then sharing it with your friends is fair game". We never once gave a timeline for when we were going to post it to facebook.
Well fast forward not even 1 week and my MIL starts texting and calling my DH asking "when will you be putting the news on facebook" "I'm getting anxious over here" etc. To which my awesome DH replies "No you can not say anything yet! When we put it on facebook you can tell, until then nothing". He continues to say "Everytime you ask we are adding a week to our wait".
Now this weekend my husband and I were out of town for the holiday. While out we recieve a text from MIL saying that she is having family over Monday (Labor day) for an improptu cookout and that we are invited. We respond that we are busy and won't be able to make it. Now my MIL is not a family event planning type person so I knew right away that she intended to use this "gathering" as a time to make an announcement so I told DH to remind her not to say anything. He sent a text that literally said "Don't forget you can NOT say anything to anyone on Monday" to which she responds "ah! well how about Tuesday?!" and again my awesome DH replies "Adding another week for every time you ask"
So the whole " DON'T tell anyone" thing seemed like a no-brainer to my DH and I but today when we returned home we recieved a text message from his aunt saying congratulations on your preganancy!! We immediately called my MIL and she says she "misunderstood what we said and she thought she could tell people on Monday" She proceeds to break out in tears on the phone and say she is "so sorry she never meant to say anything it was all so confusing." My husband points out that he literally sent her a text that specifically said she COULDN'T say anything on Monday and she continues to act like it was never addressed. And the worst part is she ruined my DH's chance to tell his grandpa that we would be having his first great-grandbaby.
So we made her call everyone she had told and tell them that she is sorry that she shared our news when we had intentions of doing it our own way and that they are not to tell anyone and they are not to put it on the internet. I am scared now that this is just the beginning of her turning this time in my DH and mine's life into her own event. I haven't talked to her yet but I am sure it will happen soon and I was curious if you had any advice on how to clearly pass along the message that this is our baby and as of now she is denied the privlages of grandma because she couldn't even respect our first wish as parents.