I've posted on Dealing with IL and FOO one other time (http://community.babycenter.com/post/a32466559/family_meeting-called_by_il_need_help_fast?cpg=33&csi=2378656331&pd=1) and got my ass handed to me.
Since then, we no longer go to my inlaws every Sunday, we see them maybe once every other week IF that much. There are still a few things that I am working on in regards to his mother, (like calling me to plan things instead of DH-who is VERY forgetful so I never find out until right before we would need to leave).
However, I just announed to all of our family that I am pregnant (due in April 2014). We are all very excited and my DH is praying very hard for a boy (so is every one else-I think I am the only one who isn't praying for a boy).
Anyway, I am VERY nervous about this birth experience based upon my first AND if it is a boy I feel like MIL is going to be MORE BSC than last time (DH is a true momma's boy if you've ever seen one.)
I feel like she will treat my son the same way she treats her son-SPOILED beyond measure. She is Mexican and the women in that culture do EVERYTHING for the males (children and adults). They don't clean up after themselves or anything. My children will be raised that they are to do their part in the home and will learn to do the dishes, laundry, vaccuum, etc. because that is the way my family will work-together. << This is my concerns about after birth (if it even is a boy)
Delivery concerns:
With my DD, I was 2 weeks overdue and was induced. Being naive, we told everyone the date I was to be induced. (My hospital has you come in late at night so you can-hopefully-sleep through the night and then things get rough in the morning-which was the case for me). I was induced at 9 pm on Tuesday. My MIL came to the hospital at 9am on Wednesday; she stayed in the waiting room with the exception of the one time she came in and brought food for DH-she didn't stay in my room long.
ILs (FIL, SIL, BIL, GMIL -MIL already there) all show up throughout the day; my FOO waits until DH text them to say to come up to the hospital. Within 30 minutes of being stitched, my Duh tells the nurse to go get everyone-I wish I had stopped her... I had all of my ILs in my room playing pass the baby while my FOO is in the back, not even able to see my DD. My family helped DH get all of our stuff to my "Mother & Baby" room upstairs while IL just stood around. After my FOO knew we had everything I needed and all of my stuff was moved, they went home (like 9pm). My ILs stay in my room until like 10:30 after AIL shows up (that woman ruined my wedding... Dont like her at all-I DEFINITELY didn't invite her to come up... I still dont know who did). When ILs were leaving MIL stops to say, "We won't do Thanksgiving dinner at the house tomorrow since I didnt have time to start anything. I think we'll do it Sunday, but I'll let you know." p>
Anyway, because Duh let everyone in the room right away, I didn't get a chance to try to breastfeed right away. DD never was able to get it; I pumped for the 1st 6 months and she was fed by a bottle. I blame Duh and ILs for that.
I found out like a week later from my mom that my FIL was posting how many cm I was dialated on FB all day- MY FIL!!! WTF is with that?!? Gross much?!?
FF to today. I am 1000% sure that this time is going to be different. I am working on writing down everything I want this time and will continually go over it with DH so he understands I'm not kidding. My mom-or my lil sis if necessary- will watch DD when the time comes since she is the closest in travel time. I will register as private and no one will be informed until after baby is born (except my mom of course b/c of DD). I dont want ANYONE to come up to the hospital until AT LEAST 24 hrs later with the exception of DD-DH will leave to go get her instead of someone bringing her.
I know what I want, I know the steps to take to ensure I get what I want-even if that means kicking DH out of my room when the time comes. I am DEFINITELY taking DH phone away on the way to the hospital so he cannot text anyone updates.
My concern is, this is the year we spend Christmas with my ILs which is about the time I think MIL will start asking what we are planning to do with DD when the times comes and all that jazz. How do I handle her questions? What do I say to her to be honest and frank but not a bitch? (Because in my heart I really want to say, "Well, MIL... because you ruined everything about DD's birth experience for me, you wont be involved at all").
I want to be prepared since I really have no idea when she will start asking questions. I want to have my answers ready in case she starts asking, say tomorrow.
BTW-I'm not telling any of them my exact due date, just saying "the beginning of April"
Thanks ladies!