My husband just called to let me know my SIL is going to lose her job the end of this month. She called my MIL and asked her if she could provide childcare (for my 9 week old) at her home for the same amount or less than we are paying daycare.
Here's the problem(s):
1. I work 20 miles away and currently have her enrolled in a quality day care close to where I work.
2. She's a self-proclaimed bitch...but I have to admit she is good with kids and sincerely cares about them.
3. She and her whole family are morbidly obese and brag about their terrible eating habits. Their entire life revolves around food. It's all they talk about. Even if I specify and send food for my LO to eat as she gets older, I think they will feed her what they are eating on top of it. (And probably teach her to lie to me about it.)
4. My LO is scheduled to move to a daycare with two ladies in my church after she's a year old and then I will be pressured to keep her with my SIL.
5. My SIL's 22-year old daughter cusses like a sailor and has told me that my BIL will give her treats to hear my LO cuss when she's old enough to talk.
6. My 3 older step children have been encouraged by them in the past to mislead/lie to us. We have reasons to believe that they have talked bad about us to our older kids.
7. She is a really negative person who constantly gossips about people in our very small town.
Here's why I should consider it:
1. My husband is extremely family-oriented and his MIL and SIL live in the houses next to us. He doesn't want to tell her no and is REALLY pressuring me to do this.
2. Their hearts are in the right place...they aren't bad people, we just don't share the same beliefs.
3. It is going to start WWIII if I don't let her do this and I will (once again) be considered the bad guy in the family who won't help her make a living. (Background: She doesn't have a GED and doesn't want anyone to know. She's been working for a grocery store as a bookeeper for years but the store is closing.)
So, how do I handle this tactfully? I don't want her to keep her but this is going to get nasty if I don't handle it right.
Thanks for any feedback!