I'm making a new thread because my husband has the direct link to the other one, and I want to hold my cards close to my chest just in case. I will post more about that after our counseling session tomorrow. In the mean time, I have more FOO stuff to deal with.
I promise this will be the last one! 
My BG is here:
http://community.babycenter.com/post/a51142822/i_was_a_duw_about_my_foo_-_updatequestions_page_3_7_email_8_text_16?cpg=20
And here:
http://community.babycenter.com/post/a50893057/how_to_to_or_co_without_support_much_longer_than_intended
-----
My mom sent me another slew of texts over the course of about twnety minutes. The last two texts are leaning more towards the "good" side of her, and it's so hard to ignore. My therapist told me she'd probably try being sweet next, and it hurts that she was right.
I am also a little sketched out about the text (#5) about coming to my house but not coming in.
Text 1:
I have no idea if you are okay. I worry about you because you seemed to need so much help. Or maybe you were just using us to get whatever you could get until you heard something you didn't want to hear. I have no way of knowing. I don't even know what your issue is because you won't say. It seems to have moved beyond needing "space" to some kind of silent retribution on your part. All I DO know is taht I love you and I miss you. Communicatoin is usually how mature people deal with issues. Punishing by witholding DS is not only mean and immature, it is using a child as a pawn, a shield, and a weapon to hurt deeply. I never expected it of you. I alwas love you but sometimes I don't like the things you do.
Text 2:
This is so sad.
Text 3:
I don't know why you are doing this and you won't tell me.
Text 4:
Every day, every occasion, reunion, homecoming, birthday (TK's Note: All four of those things were ONE EVENT), is like a funeral because all we do anymore is be sober and sad and speculate about TK this or TK that. Wonder if DS is walking. Every day. All of us.
Text 5:
Every time I go to your house I honor your need for space and don't go to your door. I don't even know if you still live there.
Text 6:
Oh TK, I worry so much because I know you get depressed and it's hard to find the way out. You were concerned, even when you were pregnant, about PPD. If you are fine, then I am grateful. But if you are in a dark scary place, please forgive me for not realizing it and being there. But I haven't seen you so it was hard for me to know. No matter what our opinions are, there are things that are more important. You.
Text 6:
You are more important to me than any of that. If you are having a hard time, let's deal wtih that first. I feel selfish crying over injustice if you are just overwhelmed or tired of feeling dependent and beholden. I know babies can be a handful and your work is demanding. I understand that you are mad at me about something. If it's just a one point issue, fine. But if you are depressed, I hope you can talk to someone about it. If you need help with DS or housework or some time to yourself, please ask for help. You have lovely sisters if you don't want to deal with me. I can accept that because I don't want to ever see you fall down and stumble in the dark. You have come too far.