This is my first time posting. I'm quite nervous. Please be gentle. The background is going to be a bit long.
I posted this on my birth board, and they told me I'm being selfish. I didn't feel that way, but now I'm self-doubting.
BG might not be really revelant to the current story, but I thought I might as well get it out: fMIL seemed fine with me until two mays ago, when df broke his leg. Since then, she's been very pa with me.
We were newly engaged when he broke his leg. On the way to the hospital to visit, I mentioned that I had df call his paternal grandparents, and his bsc grandmother asked for my phone number to call me for updates. FMIL's response was 'why? It's not like you're his wife.' It through me off, and everything since was strange.
He ended up staying at her house for a few weeks because she doesn't have stairs and we do. I have a full time job and go to school, so I'd only be able to come by for a couple hours, where I'd give him a needle, help him take a shower, and bring him his dinner. Other than the shower, she never left us alone. Until one day, after dinner, she stormed into her bedroom for a bit, then stormed out the front door, and announced in an angry tone that she was going for ice cream. I told df I wasn't going to deal with her attitude, and left. He called me a couple hours later, telling me that he had a two hour conversation about how I don't help. I had no idea what he meant, since that was all I did over there. Oh, not him. I wasn't helping her. When I would get a bottle of water, I wouldn't ask her if she wanted any (regardless that she already had one). I also never put her plate in the sink, even though she always finished before me. As far as I knew, she had two legs and a heartbeat, and I was the guest in her house.
I'm now pregnant, due in March. She has been vocal about what she thinks we should be doing with raising, and naming, our child. For the most part, df JADE's. I feel boundary stomping coming. She constantly wants to pay for everything for the baby.
She helped df paint the nursery. She dilly dallied the day it was supposed to be done, and after I put up the painter's tape, announced that she would help help with the primer that day, leave the tape on, and paint the next weekend. I said you can't do that, the tape will end up sticking to the wall or peeling the primer off. We'd have to retape after the primer was dry. She argued with me, even after me explaining that my father's a carpenter. She went downstairs, df talked to her she came back all cbf saying that if I want something a certain way, I have to say it or she'll do it the way she knows.... I thought that's what I did. Well, the next weekend, she starts saying to me, Wolf, I was thinking that I'm going to show you how you're supposed to take painter's tape off, since you obviously don't know how. My df, thank god, stopped her and said Wolf knows exactly how to do it properly. I'm so happy about that, because he usually takes her side. I was worried for when the baby comes. Since then, he's been getting better every day,, noticing how she is with me.
Well the story I posted on my birth board was originally just for me to laugh about how men don't realize how it's going to be different when the baby's here.
His mother is going to Arizona next Christmas for her father's 90th birthday. She actually invited us to go with her. Mind you we live in Philadelphia. Also, df is terrified of flying. So that would mean I'd have a nine month old, and an either drugged up or panic attack having df on a flight across the country, for my child's first Christmas. I know none of his family there, and he hasn't seen them in years. I'd be awkward for my child's first Christmas, in the middle of nowhere, where my own family is a thousand miles away while a bunch of strangers play pass the baby. I couldn't believe she asked, let alone him mentioning it to me like it was something I may agree to.
Well, after posting it, the ladies Said I was being selfish, and should do for his family. Someone actually said he and I should take separate flights, because that would make it easier . Am I being selfish. I know I'm a ftm, but I feel like no one should take my child's first Christmas from me like that, not to mention having a child that young on an airplane with necessity. Am I wrong? Be honest. Thanks. I do have a thick skin. I can take it
I posted this on my birth board, and they told me I'm being selfish. I didn't feel that way, but now I'm self-doubting.
BG might not be really revelant to the current story, but I thought I might as well get it out: fMIL seemed fine with me until two mays ago, when df broke his leg. Since then, she's been very pa with me.
We were newly engaged when he broke his leg. On the way to the hospital to visit, I mentioned that I had df call his paternal grandparents, and his bsc grandmother asked for my phone number to call me for updates. FMIL's response was 'why? It's not like you're his wife.' It through me off, and everything since was strange.
He ended up staying at her house for a few weeks because she doesn't have stairs and we do. I have a full time job and go to school, so I'd only be able to come by for a couple hours, where I'd give him a needle, help him take a shower, and bring him his dinner. Other than the shower, she never left us alone. Until one day, after dinner, she stormed into her bedroom for a bit, then stormed out the front door, and announced in an angry tone that she was going for ice cream. I told df I wasn't going to deal with her attitude, and left. He called me a couple hours later, telling me that he had a two hour conversation about how I don't help. I had no idea what he meant, since that was all I did over there. Oh, not him. I wasn't helping her. When I would get a bottle of water, I wouldn't ask her if she wanted any (regardless that she already had one). I also never put her plate in the sink, even though she always finished before me. As far as I knew, she had two legs and a heartbeat, and I was the guest in her house.
I'm now pregnant, due in March. She has been vocal about what she thinks we should be doing with raising, and naming, our child. For the most part, df JADE's. I feel boundary stomping coming. She constantly wants to pay for everything for the baby.
She helped df paint the nursery. She dilly dallied the day it was supposed to be done, and after I put up the painter's tape, announced that she would help help with the primer that day, leave the tape on, and paint the next weekend. I said you can't do that, the tape will end up sticking to the wall or peeling the primer off. We'd have to retape after the primer was dry. She argued with me, even after me explaining that my father's a carpenter. She went downstairs, df talked to her she came back all cbf saying that if I want something a certain way, I have to say it or she'll do it the way she knows.... I thought that's what I did. Well, the next weekend, she starts saying to me, Wolf, I was thinking that I'm going to show you how you're supposed to take painter's tape off, since you obviously don't know how. My df, thank god, stopped her and said Wolf knows exactly how to do it properly. I'm so happy about that, because he usually takes her side. I was worried for when the baby comes. Since then, he's been getting better every day,, noticing how she is with me.
Well the story I posted on my birth board was originally just for me to laugh about how men don't realize how it's going to be different when the baby's here.
His mother is going to Arizona next Christmas for her father's 90th birthday. She actually invited us to go with her. Mind you we live in Philadelphia. Also, df is terrified of flying. So that would mean I'd have a nine month old, and an either drugged up or panic attack having df on a flight across the country, for my child's first Christmas. I know none of his family there, and he hasn't seen them in years. I'd be awkward for my child's first Christmas, in the middle of nowhere, where my own family is a thousand miles away while a bunch of strangers play pass the baby. I couldn't believe she asked, let alone him mentioning it to me like it was something I may agree to.
Well, after posting it, the ladies Said I was being selfish, and should do for his family. Someone actually said he and I should take separate flights, because that would make it easier . Am I being selfish. I know I'm a ftm, but I feel like no one should take my child's first Christmas from me like that, not to mention having a child that young on an airplane with necessity. Am I wrong? Be honest. Thanks. I do have a thick skin. I can take it