I need validation that I'm doing right. I feel like I am, but it's hard to stop second guessing myself.
Bg: My baby turned 5 weeks on Tuesday. That was also my first day back at work. My husband was with LO for my shift, and was supposed to split my shift this Friday with my mother, as his shift started halfway through mine. My mother said that she would like to take LO shopping with her in the mall that I work at, I'm fine with that. Then after shopping, she wanted to go to a friend's home and visit until my shift ended. Initially, I was ok with this, but after thinking it over for a couple days, I realized that I would not be comfortable with my baby being more than 5 minutes away from me (I live less than 2 miles from my mall) and asked her to go to my home when she finished shopping.
Her response wasn't too bad, I knew she would be upset so a tantrum was expected. She said I should just have MIL watch the baby instead, it would make things easier, blah blah. Back and forth a little, I said I'd handle it and thanks for respecting my decision, end of convo. An hour later, I get this message on Facebook:
"i Have spent some time trying to adjust to the decisions you and DH are making. So I tested it. Got online and asked some new mothers and grandmothers of their thoughts on my not being trusted to do the best things with the best intentions for LO. The results came back that you are being controlling and selfish. I feel that you two are burning a bridge between LO and myself. There is nothing I can do about it except to wish you luck and hope that you find people in your lives that you can trust."
As you can imagine, I was upset. I wrote that I needed time to figure out my response, then told her how hurt I felt, how she was the inly person other than DH I did trust, how I thought she would understand some of my new mom anxiety, and that she couldn't have a relationship with my LO without having one with both the parents. (additional bg: she and DH don't get along, but neither of them can tell me a reason. They are nice enough when together, but each complain about it later. I try not to force any contact if I can help it.) Her response: "I am sorry you feel that way. Postpartum depression can be a bitch. Enjoy your little girl while you can. They grow so quickly and life is full of disappointments." Followed hours later (I BH'd) by a comment about forgetting how delicate I am.
And I have not responded. I want to flip out, unfriend and block her, untag her from LO pics, and TO for this plus the entitled shit she's pulled previously. But I know I'm still upset from this happening, even though it was almost 48 hours ago. Advice please!
Bg: My baby turned 5 weeks on Tuesday. That was also my first day back at work. My husband was with LO for my shift, and was supposed to split my shift this Friday with my mother, as his shift started halfway through mine. My mother said that she would like to take LO shopping with her in the mall that I work at, I'm fine with that. Then after shopping, she wanted to go to a friend's home and visit until my shift ended. Initially, I was ok with this, but after thinking it over for a couple days, I realized that I would not be comfortable with my baby being more than 5 minutes away from me (I live less than 2 miles from my mall) and asked her to go to my home when she finished shopping.
Her response wasn't too bad, I knew she would be upset so a tantrum was expected. She said I should just have MIL watch the baby instead, it would make things easier, blah blah. Back and forth a little, I said I'd handle it and thanks for respecting my decision, end of convo. An hour later, I get this message on Facebook:
"i Have spent some time trying to adjust to the decisions you and DH are making. So I tested it. Got online and asked some new mothers and grandmothers of their thoughts on my not being trusted to do the best things with the best intentions for LO. The results came back that you are being controlling and selfish. I feel that you two are burning a bridge between LO and myself. There is nothing I can do about it except to wish you luck and hope that you find people in your lives that you can trust."
As you can imagine, I was upset. I wrote that I needed time to figure out my response, then told her how hurt I felt, how she was the inly person other than DH I did trust, how I thought she would understand some of my new mom anxiety, and that she couldn't have a relationship with my LO without having one with both the parents. (additional bg: she and DH don't get along, but neither of them can tell me a reason. They are nice enough when together, but each complain about it later. I try not to force any contact if I can help it.) Her response: "I am sorry you feel that way. Postpartum depression can be a bitch. Enjoy your little girl while you can. They grow so quickly and life is full of disappointments." Followed hours later (I BH'd) by a comment about forgetting how delicate I am.
And I have not responded. I want to flip out, unfriend and block her, untag her from LO pics, and TO for this plus the entitled shit she's pulled previously. But I know I'm still upset from this happening, even though it was almost 48 hours ago. Advice please!