Me and my SO are having a "talk" with mil because she is entitled and disrespectful of us as parents and we want to set some boundaries.
Any ideas how I can nicely, but firmly say
- He's my baby and his needs come before yours
- he is My baby and you won't be involved in decision making as far as he in concerned.
- it's not appropriate for you to be prying him out of my arms when I walk into the room
- I don't appreciate you interfering with mine and SO relationship because you are making an uninformed, biased opinion
BG: we are currently living with her and things are a little strained atm. We are moving out in 2 months, but because we are moving to another country, moving out now would be a last resort. She has been good to us and she is a nice person generally but since LO was born, we've been struggling with boundaries!
A couple of days ago when I walked in from the shops, she spoke to my baby in her native language (which I don't speak), took my baby out of my arms and never said a word to me. I made a joking comment about how she's just taking him from me and then asked her if next time she can ask first. Everything then was fine, but then the next day she told my SO that I was disrespectful to make her "beg" to hold my LO when we are living in her home!
Last week I was trying to get LO to sleep and her and fil start talking to him because they don't feel like they shouldn't be able to talk to him while he's still awake, regardless of if he's tired or not!
My LO had his first injections a couple of days ago and she was crying to SO because she didn't know and someone else told her. I told him that she doesn't need a running commentary of his life, however, I do understand that she would want to know this. Basically, what it comes down to is that she wants to be the first to know everything that's going on with LO.
This morning, SO told her that when she acts so entitled, it comes across like she's trying to be a third parent. Mil then said that she acts like that because she's trying to protect SO. Apparently I make him do everything! This enraged me, I don't stop from the moment baby wakes, till he goes down at night! I'm constantly washing clothes, ironing, cleaning, cooking, shopping, all while looking after LO. On a good day I might fit in a shower!
I really want to tell her that instead of boundary stomping and if she respects me as a parent and the partner of her son, then our relationship will improve and she will probably be more involved with LO. I also want to tell her that instead of trying to overrule us and treat us like children, she should really be taking advantage of the little time she has left being so close to LO! I could move out, but it's not ideal with us moving soon, this is her last chance really and if it doesn't go well I will be moving out anyway!
Any ideas how I can nicely, but firmly say
- He's my baby and his needs come before yours
- he is My baby and you won't be involved in decision making as far as he in concerned.
- it's not appropriate for you to be prying him out of my arms when I walk into the room
- I don't appreciate you interfering with mine and SO relationship because you are making an uninformed, biased opinion
BG: we are currently living with her and things are a little strained atm. We are moving out in 2 months, but because we are moving to another country, moving out now would be a last resort. She has been good to us and she is a nice person generally but since LO was born, we've been struggling with boundaries!
A couple of days ago when I walked in from the shops, she spoke to my baby in her native language (which I don't speak), took my baby out of my arms and never said a word to me. I made a joking comment about how she's just taking him from me and then asked her if next time she can ask first. Everything then was fine, but then the next day she told my SO that I was disrespectful to make her "beg" to hold my LO when we are living in her home!
Last week I was trying to get LO to sleep and her and fil start talking to him because they don't feel like they shouldn't be able to talk to him while he's still awake, regardless of if he's tired or not!
My LO had his first injections a couple of days ago and she was crying to SO because she didn't know and someone else told her. I told him that she doesn't need a running commentary of his life, however, I do understand that she would want to know this. Basically, what it comes down to is that she wants to be the first to know everything that's going on with LO.
This morning, SO told her that when she acts so entitled, it comes across like she's trying to be a third parent. Mil then said that she acts like that because she's trying to protect SO. Apparently I make him do everything! This enraged me, I don't stop from the moment baby wakes, till he goes down at night! I'm constantly washing clothes, ironing, cleaning, cooking, shopping, all while looking after LO. On a good day I might fit in a shower!
I really want to tell her that instead of boundary stomping and if she respects me as a parent and the partner of her son, then our relationship will improve and she will probably be more involved with LO. I also want to tell her that instead of trying to overrule us and treat us like children, she should really be taking advantage of the little time she has left being so close to LO! I could move out, but it's not ideal with us moving soon, this is her last chance really and if it doesn't go well I will be moving out anyway!