Swimming pool pizza. Updates 3, 5; pizza delivery 6, 7, pics 8, 20, 25, 31, 32, 37, 43, 49

Hi, ladies. I haven't posted in a while.. My only other post was regarding MIL, who does not feature in this story.

I guess I'm just feeding llamas (and admitting to my dumbassery). Its more like snack food than a feast.

So. Backstory... I am due with our second in 2 weeks. We have been living in my parents' home since DS was born, because they moved out of state and didn't want another horrible rental fiasco (they had to do a lot of house repair after their last tenants). This gave us a lot of financial leeway, which came in handy recently after some nasty financial setbacks (job loss). I waffled about staying because living here involves dealing with annual boundary stomps, but we ended up staying.

Clearly a dumb idea, even though it saved our necks this past year. Ended up with a positive pregnancy test the same week we found out we have no more income.

Took a while, but DH finally finds a job making decent but not great money. It's 2 hours away because we live in the freaking middle of nowhere, so he is gone 5 days a week and stays with FIL to save gas while we work on saving up to move and prepare for a new baby. We knew we wouldn't be able to move until baby was a couple months old, because we have to wait for his promotion to be able to afford the new area.

Mom drives down shortly after DH starts the new job. She's staying at her sister's 10 minutes away and will stay until a couple weeks after the baby is born, as DH will not have time off and we wanted to make sure I have help nearby in case I end up with another C section. All is good.

My mother is a boundary stopper by nature but thanks to DWIL I have built up a nice spine with my family. She no longer comes over unannounced or waltzes into my bedroom because it's "her" house. She's learned to keep quiet about my parenting choices. So, these last couple months have gone well. She helps my aunt out with her business so I see her about once or twice a week. We have had a pretty good relationship for the past year and a half so I'm actually enjoying this... Yeah. Silly me.

Then it happened. Two weeks ago, I finally made my mother's life unbearable.

I had driven over to visit. A sweet boxer was loitering in the area to see what I was doing. Rural country with no leash laws, this is a normal occurrence. I said hi and pet the nice dog after coaxing her over (she was shy and it took a little bit). She circled around the lawn just to check us out one more time, but was not even on the grass... And my mother picked up a few rocks and started throwing them at the dog.

I admit it. I lost it. I screamed for her to stop throwing rocks at the dog (I was probably 20 feet from her). I saw the look on her face - the how DARE you embarrass me in front of the neighborhood?! expression. I didn't care. I stormed up to her and told her to never throw rocks at a dog again, and that people could call the freaking cops on her. She snapped, "Fine!" in this incredibly pissy tone. I reiterated my statement that people could call the cops on her and asked if she understood how serious it was. She rolled her eyes and said, "Okaaaaay." Like a teenager.

A week later she drops off a care package at the house and says, "I want to talk to you."

Okay. I'm pleasant.

She brings up the dog incident and tells me how wrong I am for shouting at her. I told her calmly that I would have even shouted at my husband if I saw him doing that. I wasn't yelling at her as my mother, but as someone throwing rocks at a dog. She immediately started in on how people were looking through windows and witnessed my blatant disrespect of her and how I'm an awful daughter, and I am not ever allowed to raise my voice at her. (I looked around when I yelled at her because I did feel guilty and didn't want to deal with an irate owner and yeah... No. No one was looking through their windows).

I again tell her calmly that I don't care if you are my pastor at church, there are certain things that are simply unacceptable. Abuse is one of them. Animal or human. I'm sure I could have reacted a little more quietly, but I am not going to apologize for being upset with her for her actions. If she didn't want to be yelled at, perhaps she should stop throwing rocks at people's dogs? (I got a little snarky because she kept shrieking about how people saaaaaaaw)

Mom went crazy. Yes, I wasn't necessarily diplomatic, but I really don't care who you are - - I will get in your face for throwing rocks at someone's dog. WTF? Anyway, of course she starts telling me how I am an awful and selfish daughter. That I have changed so much. That I used to be a good girl. That I treat her like dirt because I tell her not to do certain things, like tell my son breastfeeding is gross, or not to spank him, or not to feed him without running it by me, and obviously because I can't trust her to babysit I'm a horrible mother who claims everyone is a child abuser and so nobody wants anything to do with my kid in fear of being called out on abuse (probably because the one time she swatted my child I jumped all over her?).

On top of this, she hates my husband because he doesn't call her or go to visit her for hours on his one and a half days home he gets with us every week. He's lazy because he won't fix the crack my father made in the ceiling when he was crawling around in there. He's lazy because he won't demand that his stepdad comes over to replace her roof and fix her plumbing after all she has done for us. Not sure what my husband has to do with this situation, but clearly she's just held onto way too much resentment.

I'm abusing her because I won't go to Bible study. She's a Jehovah's Witness. Apparently I lied to her about joining them and because I am living under her roof, that makes me an abuser. All because I agreed to try Bible study and it didn't work out and I stopped. K.

My child is going to grow up to be physically abusive to me, because he watches me disrespect her by telling her no.

I'm worse than my psychotic aunt who literally prostitutes herself and sold her daughter to her ex husband (gave him full custody for the low price of $6,000) because I tell my mom what she can and cannot do with my child or my life... And because I always put my husband over her in priority. Gosh darn it.

I can't remember the rest of the gems. And the she straightened up after all her screaming and said regally, "I want you to move out. As soon as possible."

I looked at her and just said, "Okay."

Then she sniffled, said I never care about her feelings, and that I need to "think about what I've done". And left.

That was a week ago. Haven't heard from her. Have no intention of calling or texting for forgiveness as she expects.

Meanwhile I've made oodles of phone calls. We are scheduled to look at several properties next Tuesday. Some are available immediately, so hopefully we will be moving out before the end of the month! I got a deferral on my car payment and it will be tight and my husband may have to starve for a few days, but we'll just have to make it work.

I've never been so excited to live in a shithole in my life (and I'm terrified). But it's worth the freedom. So worth it. Sure we wanted to save up and wait for his pay increase to get into a bigger, better home in a safer neighborhood... But in the end, being away from my mother is way more important than that.

I'm not perfect. I certainly didn't kowtow to my mommy as much as I probably "should" have, what with her helping us financially. I certainly could have handled the dog situation more diplomatically. I could have just apologized.

But... I didn't. And thanks to her tirade, she's the one who will have no idea if her second grandchild is a grandson or a granddaughter, or what their name is, or what they look like. I hope it was worth every word she spit in my face. You don't talk shit about my husband or our parenting and still get to see us.

Actually, I hope it eats her like acid that she will never know.

Thankfully my brother told me that he's sorry our mother is crazy, so I still have one family member left. (my father has been on ELC for years, so he'll just go with my mommy into the abyss).

Sorry for the rambling and disjointedness. Exhausted third trimester brain cells.

(please cross fingers that these properties are in decent shape so we can get a lease signed next week!)