I've recently discovered my Mother is a narcasist. I did so because I am the scapegoat and brother is the golden child (GC). I was visiting family in Chicago recently and tried to lay down some emotional boundaries for a healthy rship with my mother. GC was very disresepctful to my Mum during his divorce to cover up his own lack of responsibility. He now says I should have a "better and closer" rship with Mum. So unhealthy given she is a narcassist! I've therefore never been close with her for a good reason: my instinct told me it wasn't a good idea. She favours and loves GC to bits, and doesn't understand me, tries to change me from the person who I really am. GC and his fiance now apply stacks (regular and sustained) of pressure to me to be "closer with Mum." GC gets Dad on board too. This makes me feel upset because I do not want to be like my mother (the first thing anyone with a narcassistic mother should decide). I think my brother can jam it. He's only saying it to alleviate the pressure from himself, absolve himself of his true responsibility. Also, I think he is only doing it to save his fiance from having to develop a rship with Mum (therefore all the responsibility lies on my head). Also, to project his and Mum's issues onto me (I'm the scapegoat). What can I say to my brother whenever he says "you should have a closer rship with Mum"?
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