Please tell me if I'm being a unappreciative jerk. I have a wonderful mil I know I'm so lucky and I really do love her. My husband and I come from completely diffrent backgrounds his family is in my opinion almost to close its unhealthy. They work together, all 3 kids work for dad they all live within 5 blocks of each other and if it were up to everyone we would spend at least 1 night together a week. The kids are all in they're 30's and have never really been on they're own. it's so hard for me to relate because I have never had any help from my parents have been on my own since 17 had no guidance,and have to work so hard for everything on my own. My parents had me at 16 and were never really parents to me which has made me a very independent hardened woman. I was a single mom to my dd who is now 8 when my husband met me.
Here's the problem I feel overwhelmed by all the things my in laws want to do for us. I don't want my in laws so involved in our lives, MIL wants to buy everything for our baby she says stuff like " you are going to never see your baby cuz I'm going to want it all the time". She baby's my husband so much and so does his dad it's sick. He is the favorite.
They are the nicest people but I just can't handle parents being so involved and I know it's my own issues but I feel like there has to be boundaries! Tonight my MIL made dinner to bring over and I know most people would love that but I was planning on making a nice dinner for my husband! It's just irritating. I am a 36 year old woman/ mother that has been doing it myself forever so it's intrusive to me to have another woman do my job.
These of course just a few minor issues but trust me there have been so many other examples of when I just want to say " Your kids are adults let them live their lives and back off a little!" They expect us to spend all holidays at they're house which is a issue for me as well I want to create my own traditions, cook meals and be in my home with my family. But that will never fly and I know that it's totally normal for normal families to spend this kind of time together I just can't handle it!
Here's the problem I feel overwhelmed by all the things my in laws want to do for us. I don't want my in laws so involved in our lives, MIL wants to buy everything for our baby she says stuff like " you are going to never see your baby cuz I'm going to want it all the time". She baby's my husband so much and so does his dad it's sick. He is the favorite.
They are the nicest people but I just can't handle parents being so involved and I know it's my own issues but I feel like there has to be boundaries! Tonight my MIL made dinner to bring over and I know most people would love that but I was planning on making a nice dinner for my husband! It's just irritating. I am a 36 year old woman/ mother that has been doing it myself forever so it's intrusive to me to have another woman do my job.
These of course just a few minor issues but trust me there have been so many other examples of when I just want to say " Your kids are adults let them live their lives and back off a little!" They expect us to spend all holidays at they're house which is a issue for me as well I want to create my own traditions, cook meals and be in my home with my family. But that will never fly and I know that it's totally normal for normal families to spend this kind of time together I just can't handle it!