I'll try to link my BG if I can find it...
http://community.babycenter.com/post/a43640419/narcissist_mil_collateral_damage_long_small_trigger
Basically my MIL boundary-stomped the shit out of my pregnancy and subsequent delivery, and has been on a TO since 5 days postpartum (my fail, shoulda been a lot sooner). She and her partner (fSMIL2) have texted/called regularly since the TO (3 months now) with MIL occasionally leaving nasty messages telling us we're horrible people for keeping her from her graaaaaaandbaby, she didn't raise DH that way, blah blah blah. At the end of July, DH and I took LO on a little vacation into the National Park (it was awesome!), and when we came back into cell phone range DH had 5 missed calls from MIL and 5 voicemails of her hanging up. I checked MIL's FB page (she has a history of stealing and re-posting photos of LO) when we got home, and she had posted "mean people don't bother me a bit, mean people who pretend to be nice bother me a whole lot". Whatever, no big deal, she's been posting nasty or P/A shit on FB since we TOed her. The next day, DH got a text inviting us to his kid brother's birthday (BBIL). Ultimately we decided that DH would go, but LO and I would stay home. MIL asked where we were, DH said 'at home', and ignored her the rest of the party.
After the party, MIL posted on FB saying how great it was that all her friends came out to BBIL's birthday, giving special mention to her friend's twin babies who were there, and then mentioning DH by name (his full name), prompting one of her friends to comment asking whether 'mom and baby' where there, noting we were not mentioned.
Since then, fSMIL2 has texted asking if we would join them for breakfast to sort things out (we BHed), MIL has posted a bunch of creepy 'mother is everything' memes on her FB (ex: "your mother lives in your laughter... She's your first love, your first friend, even your first enemy, but nothing on earth can separate you, not time, not space... Not even death"), and fSMIL2 sent another text asking for birth information (birthdate, weight, length, time of day, place) for me and LO for a family tree. We BHed, figuring it was a sneaky way to get LO's stats again (easier to play GMOTY that way). Apparently she texted my mother asking for the same info, and for baby photos of me and LO.
How do we deal with this woman? She still doesn't realize her behavior was not ok, so we're not ready to end the TO (and she's BSC... She told golden child YBIL he was "retarded" and would never make it when he decided to move out, then called/texted every day for 2 years until he finally cut her off... I don't want her to make LO her new golden child, only to treat her like shit for not doing something)
Help, please!
ETA BG link & update title to better reflect MIL.
http://community.babycenter.com/post/a43640419/narcissist_mil_collateral_damage_long_small_trigger
Basically my MIL boundary-stomped the shit out of my pregnancy and subsequent delivery, and has been on a TO since 5 days postpartum (my fail, shoulda been a lot sooner). She and her partner (fSMIL2) have texted/called regularly since the TO (3 months now) with MIL occasionally leaving nasty messages telling us we're horrible people for keeping her from her graaaaaaandbaby, she didn't raise DH that way, blah blah blah. At the end of July, DH and I took LO on a little vacation into the National Park (it was awesome!), and when we came back into cell phone range DH had 5 missed calls from MIL and 5 voicemails of her hanging up. I checked MIL's FB page (she has a history of stealing and re-posting photos of LO) when we got home, and she had posted "mean people don't bother me a bit, mean people who pretend to be nice bother me a whole lot". Whatever, no big deal, she's been posting nasty or P/A shit on FB since we TOed her. The next day, DH got a text inviting us to his kid brother's birthday (BBIL). Ultimately we decided that DH would go, but LO and I would stay home. MIL asked where we were, DH said 'at home', and ignored her the rest of the party.
After the party, MIL posted on FB saying how great it was that all her friends came out to BBIL's birthday, giving special mention to her friend's twin babies who were there, and then mentioning DH by name (his full name), prompting one of her friends to comment asking whether 'mom and baby' where there, noting we were not mentioned.
Since then, fSMIL2 has texted asking if we would join them for breakfast to sort things out (we BHed), MIL has posted a bunch of creepy 'mother is everything' memes on her FB (ex: "your mother lives in your laughter... She's your first love, your first friend, even your first enemy, but nothing on earth can separate you, not time, not space... Not even death"), and fSMIL2 sent another text asking for birth information (birthdate, weight, length, time of day, place) for me and LO for a family tree. We BHed, figuring it was a sneaky way to get LO's stats again (easier to play GMOTY that way). Apparently she texted my mother asking for the same info, and for baby photos of me and LO.
How do we deal with this woman? She still doesn't realize her behavior was not ok, so we're not ready to end the TO (and she's BSC... She told golden child YBIL he was "retarded" and would never make it when he decided to move out, then called/texted every day for 2 years until he finally cut her off... I don't want her to make LO her new golden child, only to treat her like shit for not doing something)
Help, please!
ETA BG link & update title to better reflect MIL.