Not only is she moving to my town, she is moving two doors down from where we bought our dream house.
She used to be semi normal, but now I think I realized she was just wanting to be super enmeshed. We have had a few pretty big fights since LO was born eight months ago, and she has cried that she is faaaaaamily, and cried hysterically when I told her she was extended family. She also countered with, "in court, you immediate family is your parents, siblings and grandparents." I told her that any therapist worth their salt would disagree.
She constantly tells me that she wants to be LOs daycare (not happening), and then she dropped this bomb on me, "LO is going to have to get used to having her faaaamily - oh, I mean extended family - around all the time" I asked her what she meant, she pretty much bean dipped me.
She also wants to have the floors refinished in her new house, and said if they weren't done when she was ready to move that she would just stay with us until they were done. I told her I would get started on calling people and getting quotes and things so that wouldn't be necessary. She got all butt hurt asking why I didn't want her staying with us.
She is infuriating, a super manipulator, and wants to be totally enmeshed. She threatens things like, "I am not going to call you, you cLl me when you are ready" and then she calls not a week later. I shut that down and got off the phone and didn't call her for awhile. Then we fought before Christmas, and she told me she wasn't coming over for Christmas Day. I told her that was just fine, to suit herself. Who shows up Christmas morning with my sister? You guessed it. I according to her, I don't tell her I love her enough, I don't care enough, blah, blah. I was in therapy for other things, and I did work on my spine with my therapist then, but have been unable to go for quite some time. I want to say that my spine is stronger than pine but softer than maple. I have come a looooong way in standing up to her, and my spine grows a bit each day.
I just don't know how to lay down boundaries and make them clear, while also avoiding the tear feat that will ensue. I am not going to have her be dropping in all the time, or even see her every week, I will go insane, and my poor DH's head will explode. Help!
She used to be semi normal, but now I think I realized she was just wanting to be super enmeshed. We have had a few pretty big fights since LO was born eight months ago, and she has cried that she is faaaaaamily, and cried hysterically when I told her she was extended family. She also countered with, "in court, you immediate family is your parents, siblings and grandparents." I told her that any therapist worth their salt would disagree.
She constantly tells me that she wants to be LOs daycare (not happening), and then she dropped this bomb on me, "LO is going to have to get used to having her faaaamily - oh, I mean extended family - around all the time" I asked her what she meant, she pretty much bean dipped me.
She also wants to have the floors refinished in her new house, and said if they weren't done when she was ready to move that she would just stay with us until they were done. I told her I would get started on calling people and getting quotes and things so that wouldn't be necessary. She got all butt hurt asking why I didn't want her staying with us.
She is infuriating, a super manipulator, and wants to be totally enmeshed. She threatens things like, "I am not going to call you, you cLl me when you are ready" and then she calls not a week later. I shut that down and got off the phone and didn't call her for awhile. Then we fought before Christmas, and she told me she wasn't coming over for Christmas Day. I told her that was just fine, to suit herself. Who shows up Christmas morning with my sister? You guessed it. I according to her, I don't tell her I love her enough, I don't care enough, blah, blah. I was in therapy for other things, and I did work on my spine with my therapist then, but have been unable to go for quite some time. I want to say that my spine is stronger than pine but softer than maple. I have come a looooong way in standing up to her, and my spine grows a bit each day.
I just don't know how to lay down boundaries and make them clear, while also avoiding the tear feat that will ensue. I am not going to have her be dropping in all the time, or even see her every week, I will go insane, and my poor DH's head will explode. Help!